10 Basic Ways to Find Happiness

We all want to feel happy, and each one of us has different ways of getting there. Here are steps you can take to bring more happiness into your life:

  1. Be with others who make you smile. Studies show that we are happiest when we are around those who are also happy.
  2. Hold on to your values. What you find true, what you know is fair, and what you believe in are all values. Over time, the more you honor them, the better you will feel about yourself.
  3. Accept the good. Look at your life and take stock of what’s working, and don’t push away something just because it isn’t perfect. When good things happen, even the very little ones, let them in.
  4. Imagine the best. Don’t be afraid to look at what you really want and see yourself getting it. Many people avoid this process because they don’t want to be disappointed if things don’t work out. The truth is that imagining getting what you want is a big part of achieving it.
  5. Do things you love. Maybe you can’t skydive every day or take vacations every season, but as long as you get to do the things you love every once in a while, you will find greater happiness.
  6. Find purpose. Those who believe they are contributing to the well-being of humanity tend to feel better about their lives. Most people want to be part of something greater than they are, simply because it’s fulfilling.
  7. Listen to your heart. You are the only one who knows what fills you up. Your family and friends may think you’d be great at something that really doesn’t float your boat. It can be complicated following your bliss. Just be smart, and keep your day job for the time being.
  8. Push yourself, not others. It’s easy to feel that someone else is responsible for your fulfillment, but the reality is that it is really your charge. Once you realize that, you have the power to get where you want to go. Stop blaming others or the world, and you’ll find your answers much sooner.
  9. Be open to change. Even if it doesn’t feel good, change is the one thing you can count on. A change will happen, so make contingency plans and emotionally shore yourself up for the experience.
  10. Bask in the simple pleasures. Those who love you, treasured memories, silly jokes, warm days, and starry nights—these are the ties that bind and the gifts that keep on giving.

Happiness is within your grasp, but sometimes just out of reach. Understanding what works best for you is the first step in finding more of it.

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Always Tell The Truth – No Matter What!

One of the most important things my mother wanted to instill in my brothers, sisters and I, was to always tell the truth, no matter what it is.

She promised us if we told the truth we wouldn’t get into trouble. She said that telling a lie was worse than anything wrong we could possibly do. We believed her. When we did something wrong, our conscience would bother us and we went to her with the truth and promptly got yelled at and punished. When we protested that we told the truth so as not to get in trouble, she would answer “This is nothing compared to what I would have done had you lied.” Consequently, since we didn’t know how bad it could get, we still told the truth and took our punishments.

Of course children don’t really understand how telling the truth is not just about being honest and forthcoming and owning your mistakes. They won’t fully understand how telling the truth builds trust in your relationships till years later. It’s hard to get that concept across at an early age. Lord knows, we want to be able to trust our children because they aren’t always going to be in our care 24/7. At some point they will go off to school and interact with others and things will happen. You want to be able to believe your child and trust that what they tell you is in fact the truth. It’s very hard to defend a child that is prone to lying, or to trust them to do the right thing. I think it was very wise of my mother to make telling the truth an important issue in our family, and it was a value we learned before setting foot in school.

I have met and gotten to know many different people. I appreciate those who are straight shooters and tell the truth no matter what it might be. I feel like I can trust them and have confidence that if I ask them their opinion I am going to get the truth. Some people like to go around the bush before getting to the truth. I really never cared for that approach. Maybe they are trying to be tactful or sensitive, but sometimes their message is lost or watered down in all their finesse. I prefer that they deliver their message bluntly rather than tip toe around it trying to make it sound better. Others are just liars or they exaggerate the truth until it is unrecognizable. I don’t tolerate lies well. I would never trust someone who makes a habit out of lying or twisting the truth. They are being dishonest and untrustworthy and you really can never believe anything they have to say, so why bother continuing a relationship with them?

Another thing about telling the truth to someone is to consider your intentions. I always feel that if my intentions are good, then the person needs to know. I would feel terrible if I withheld information and something bad were to happen. I would feel responsible. I would rather the person were angry with me for telling them the truth, than for something bad to happen because they didn’t have all the information to consider. That is the personal rule I have use and so far no one has gotten angry with me.

The main thing I live by is “the truth always comes out.” It doesn’t even make sense to lie in the first place. You not only have to keep track of your lies and have a good memory, but in the end the truth will always reveal itself.

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Life 101

I decided to write some lessons I have learned and want to pass on .  Wisdom from experience cannot be taught in a classroom, but it should still be passed on when possible.  Here goes:

I want to tell you the main lessons I have learned in life and I would be curious to know how many of them you have learned so far. Some of these were instilled in me by my mother and father and other things I have learned on my own.

Always be honest and truthful. If you are, you won’t have to have a good memory, like you do if you chose to lie. Lies and being dishonest destroy people’s trust and confidence in you. Once a trust is broken, and it only takes a second, it will take a very long time, if ever. to rebuild.  Surround yourself with honest, genuine people, so you will not be hurt.

If you love someone, tell them. Life is short, tragedies happen, and you never know if you will see or talk to someone you love again. You should never be afraid to say those three little words when you have the chance. You will never regret saying them too often, but you may regret not saying them when you had the chance.

Get a good education. That is something you should instill in your children from the moment they can understand you. You should never stop learning. Even though you may need a break from school after graduating college, you should consider going back and advancing to the next level at some point.

Always do your best, whatever you do. Anything you do, you should give it your all. If you do things half way, you will be perceived as someone who performs in a mediocre way, and then that becomes part of who you are and what people expect of you.

Don’t take loved ones for granted. None of us knows how long we will have the people we love in our lives. It will be easier to accept their leaving if we know we did not take them for granted when we had the opportunity to tell them and show them how much we appreciate them as often as possible.

Spend time with your children and, if you can, be a stay at home mom/dad or work part-time. Children grow up in the blink of an eye. You don’t want to miss out on their milestones or their first few years. You want to be the one to raise them and teach them, hug them and kiss them, make memories with them.

Say “I’m sorry” or “I was wrong” when you are. You will feel better and it will prevent any situation from getting worse and stop hurt feelings and anger from festering. Do it as soon as possible. It makes you the bigger person and you can stop dwelling on the issue and move on.

Don’t rush into marriage. You want to make sure that whoever you meet is compatible with you and will treat you right and respect you. You need to get to know their family because when you marry someone you marry into their family. Don’t overlook red flags. If something is troubling you then you should not overlook it, but think about it and be aware of it. The time to bring it up is before you get serious not after you get married. Make sure you are on the same page about children, how many to have, where to live, finances, and other important issues that become a “couple’s” decision. Get premarital counseling and a prenuptial agreement if you have a lot more money than the person you are marrying.

Make time for yourself and the things that make you happy. You should do this to keep yourself from getting burned out with work or the kids or stress. It’s important to take care of yourself so that you can do all the things that are expected of you and you need to do.

Be true to yourself. Do what you know is right for you, don’t go along with what other people think is best for you, If something is important to you, it will be important to those who really love you too.

Don’t worry about what others think of you. You just have to be happy with who you are and people should love you for who you are. Do not settle for anything in life. You can have whatever you set your mind to.

Marry someone who is not only your mate but your best friend. It will be easier to get through life situations if you can talk things through with your spouse and have someone who will understand and care about how you feel.

Never lend anyone money.  Money issues can ruin relationships. If you lend friends money you are likely to lose both the friend and the money. Just say you don’t have any to lend and keep your finances to yourself. If people know you have money they will ask you for it and you will feel bad to say no.

Save your money and pay off your credit cards. Don’t put yourself into debt and add stress to your life. Either had the money to pay for something or don’t buy it. Real Estate is a good investment, location is sometimes the most important reason for property values to go up. A beautiful house in a lousy area will not go up much, but a run down house in a good area will get you more than its worth.

Don’t say mean or hurtful things in the heat of the moment in an argument. Words hurt and once they are out, there they are there forever. You can’t take them back and you don’t want to regret saying something and feeling guilty about it afterwards.

When someone confides in you and needs compassion, listen with your heart. Everyone needs support at one time or another. Be there for your friends and they may be there for you when you need them.  Always stay close and care for one another. You can be sure you can depend on each other, when other people can be unreliable.

When someone hugs you, never be the first to let go. Affection is very important. Express affection with your spouse, your children and others. Hugs and kisses are very important for happiness.

And, life lesson #1, always put the toilet paper on the roll the right way, over is right, under is wrong (see diagram below)!

 You Are Now Ready For Life!!!

 

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