The biggest threat to any type of relationship is
When you don’t like something then express it. Most importantly do it without trying to hurt someone because they hurt you. Instead, try helping them feel what you feel, expressed by both your words and actions.
When people understand
they usually do not judge.
The better you know yourself,
the better you can know others.
Spending time with a person is how you get to know them.
In the same way you must build a trusting relationship with yourself. You need to spend time getting to know more about you. You can never get to know yourself if you are surrounded by lots of noise, friends, and family, or if you are always preoccupied with things to do.
Being around others is vital.
We learn from their experiences and perspectives. It is just as important spending time alone, in peaceful surroundings. Peaceful surroundings doesn’t mean absolute silence. It means the absence of interruption and other distractions.
If you’re always listening to others,
you’ll just become the sum of
everyone else’s ideas.
Your deepest reflections cannot be heard unless you make time for them to be heard. Without really listening to yourself, you won’t have anything to keep you grounded. You’ll fall into all types of emotional traps. Most important you’ll find it difficult to resist the negative influences of others.
Of all the judgments we pass in life,
none is more important than
the judgment we pass on ourselves.
You may also want to use this opportunity to consider your life goals in all aspects: physical, mental and spiritual. You need to sit with your emotions and spend the time to distinguish them and label them. In the questioning process, ask yourself what your values are.
Core values will be things like compassion, honesty, love, kindness, loyalty, etc. Clarifying your core values will give you an exact picture of who you are.
- Find out what makes your heart sing.
- Find out what keeps you excited.
It is important your actions are supported by your core values and fundamentals. If not, you will find yourself in self sabotage. The ability to reach your highest potential is severely limited when you are busy self sabotaging!
Find out what inspires you. These are the things that define you.
Being with nature is also a good idea. You tend to connect better to your inner being, when you are more relaxed. The answers that you seek, while in a state of mental relaxation, surface more easily. You become clearer and clearer, in the intents that you sent out to the Universe(God). Because this intent is in perfect alignment with the real you, you do not experience any conflict or sabotage.
Time alone to
meditate and reflect
is productive time.
You cannot expect to function well physically everyday, if you are out of balance in other aspects such as mentally and spiritually. Very importantly, consider putting aside “me” time on a regular basis. I choose to spend “me” time meditating, reading books or simply just be with myself.
You must guard your personal quiet time and really make use of it.
This is your alone time with the Universe (God).
This is inviolable sacred time.
- This is when you connect with your soul.
- This is when you learn how to be at peace with the storms of life.
- This is where you’ll find comfort and guidance.
This is what defines you.
This is when you know the importance of love.
One thought on “These Are the Things That Define You – Part Two – The Importance of Love”
So many truths here Thom.
Just yesterday i was listening to a podcast with a famous Australian author, John Marsden who touched on what you say about getting to know our feelings. He went into therapy in his late teenage years and could describe situations but not his feelings about them. I found this amazing as he is a great writer. He explained that his homelife had been difficult, with a strict father and a manipulative mother and no one even talking about or naming emotions. PS I love your values diagram.